Droopy Eyelids

Last night was rough... to say the least. I am running on less than 2 hours of sleep today. Not such a good thing. Elijah got a runny nose a few days ago.. try as we might to keep him away from Alice, she started getting stuffy yesterday. This led to her coughing, sneezing, and crying most of the night. I tried to suction her nose often, but of course this makes her even more upset and leads to more screaming and crying. Then the crying would cause her to gag on her mucous and she would start choking and spitting up. Then she would be hungry because she spit up all of her milk so I would nurse her some more... she would then get frustrated because she was trying to nurse but couldn't breathe and the vicious cycle would start all over again.

I was frustrated and tired. Barely able to keep my eyes open I could only pray through the crying. Praying God would take the sickness from her, to give me patience, to help me better understand her needs. I pray so often for healing for my little girl. It hurts me to see her suffer. The acid reflux is enough on its own, add to it this cold and I am going to have a lot more sleepless nights this week.

I was even more frustrated at Samuel. As I sat there, comforting, rocking, nursing, changing, and cleaning up OUR baby, he lay beside me... SNORING. I understand he works and he wakes up early so therefor he needs his rest. But I need my rest too! I however make the sacrifices that having a newborn demands. He did offer once after several hours of me trying to comfort her to hold her. But by then I was angry at him and bitterly sneered "just go back to sleep." Part of me is jealous. Jealous that he gets to lay there asleep while night after night I wake to take care of our daughter. I love my daughter and I am willing to do what it takes to meet her needs. Don't get me wrong... I just wish Samuel would be more helpful at night.

Now today is my first day back to work. What a great day to be going back...

Scripture-

Isaiah 41:10

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. 

Prayer-
God please forgive me for being angry at my husband last night. Thank you for bringing him into my life. He is a wonderful husband and does an amazing job providing emotionally, spiritually and financially for our family. Give him strength for today, as well as understanding and patience tonight as he watches the kids. Thank you for my beautiful children. Heal their little bodies and take this sickness from them. Let them be comforted tonight as they rest. Allow them to sleep well so that they not only get their rest, but I can get some of mine. Give me patience. Let today be a profitable day at work and help me find a way to share your love with those I come in contact with. 


In Christ Jesus' name I pray,
Amen